Tuesday, September 16, 2014

The Most Beautiful Thing

I am quite sure that today I have been the happiest mom on the planet. I was a nervous wreck all morning anticipating my ultrasound after lunch. When they called my name my heart sank as I was unsure of what I would see. When I was on the table I held my breath until Baby C popped up on the screen. I immediately saw that baby had grown and before she even pointed it out to me, I saw that beautiful little flutter that I was searching for--the flutter that meant my baby's heart is beating good and strong.

Baby C had a HB of 125 which is spot on for this stage in pregnancy! I felt like I could finally breathe--I felt so relieved, joyful, and thankful all at once. I've been telling everyone I have a feeling this one is a take home baby!

They changed our due date from the 13th to the 19th. I was super ok with that because I wasn't digging the Friday the 13th thing. I'm not superstitious, but this is my rainbow baby and I just feel better with this new date. Silly, I know but y'all I swear I'm borderline neurotic right now.

I held myself together until I went back to the lab for a blood draw. Then I sat back there and I sobbed--not teared up, not cried--I sobbed. They were the happiest tears that have ever been shed. God is so good y'all. He is so amazing and He never fails.

Now that my due date has been backed up, I'm actually just now hitting seven weeks. Morning sickness is beginning, although not just in the morning. I'm super exhausted and I'm finally starting to feel pregnant. I dream about this baby all the time. I don't share this much, but when I was pregnant with Barrett I had a lot of dreams about losing him. I never had dreams of bringing him home. With this baby I have dreamt almost every night of sitting around the house with the baby--a girl in all my dreams. I'm calling GIRL now. I'm 2/2 so far, but I there is a first time for everything. We will see in about two months! Either way--HEALTHY is the main thing!

With Audrey I craved sweet and salty; with Barrett, sweet and sour. This baby? Just random things--spinach, yogurt, peanut butter, and caramel apples to name a few. I'm learning to take it easy and rest--not taking any chances with this baby.

I am so thankful for this healthy little bean. I feel good about it today and hopefully this peace continues. I'm sure I ultimately won't feel better until I make it past the 18 week marker where we lost Barrett. That seems so far away, but I'm treasuring every moment with this little one and taking it one day at a time. Back to the doctor next week!

Thank you so much for your prayers--you have no idea how much that means. I know Baby C is one prayed for little bean and I'm so grateful for that! I can feel it for sure! God is good all the time y'all!

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